Breakup Recovery Tip #7: Create A New Nighttime Ritual
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 26, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Breakup Recovery Tip #6: Give Your Bedroom A Makeover
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 25, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Breakup Recovery Tip #5: Practice Self Nurturing Behavior
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 24, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Breakup Recovery Tip #4: Journal Your Recovery
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 23, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Breakup Recovery Tip #3: Create A New Morning Ritual
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 22, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Breakup Recovery Tip #2: Recruit A Boohoo Crew
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 21, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Who’s in your Woohoo Crew?
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 20, 2011 - 7:00 AM
I hope you’re having a fabulous week. Do you have big plans for the Fourth of July weekend? I’ll been barbecuing with friends and family, enjoying the beautiful Southern California weather, and getting ready for my media tour to New York in conjunction with my book It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown Workbook: A 21-Day Action Plan to Plot Your Revenge, Spoil Yourself, and Find Out How Good Your Life Is Without Him.
But first, I’ve got a question for you. Who’s in your Woohoo Crew?
In both my books and in my emails, I know I talk a lot about the importance of having a Boohoo Crew, i.e. your inner circle of support during breakup recovery. But once your heart is on the mend, the support shouldn’t end there.
To create a life you truly love, it’s important to have a core group of loved ones who can celebrate life’s triumphs and commiserate during the tough times. And that’s where your Woohoo Crew comes in.
So who’s in your Woohoo Crew?
Let me tell you a little bit about mine. My husband’s at the core. He’s amazing! I also have incredible friends, supportive parents (after years of training!), and a great support staff for my business.
See, over the years I’ve come to realize the value of having ongoing support, a trusted inner circle, and knowing when I need to ask for help.
With all of life’s ups and downs, I know that not everyone is lucky enough to have a Woohoo Crew.
That’s why I created my 8 Week Heal Your Heart TeleClass – to help women just like you heal their hearts in record time in a supportive and nurturing group environment. (We’re in Week #6 and everyone is experiencing INCREDIBLE momentum!)
The members in my Rock Your Love Life program are also ROCKING their results. Talk about a spirited and amazing Woohoo Crew!
And that’s why I do private coaching – to provide hands on guidance, help, and accountability for individuals looking to powerfully transform what’s happening in their lives – in ALL AREAS! The work is pretty incredible. And I love doing it!
So again, I want to know… who’s in your Woohoo Crew?
If you’ve got loving and supportive friends and family, congratulations! You’re poised for success, happiness, and abundance.
If you don’t, you may need some help.
I’d like to help you. I’m hosting a FREE call on Monday, July 6 @ 6pm Pacific. On the call, I’ll answer all of your burning relationship questions.
To register for my FREE call, go here:
http://lisasteadman.com/ask-lisa-steadman
Once you sign up, the call information will be emailed directly to you, along with instructions on how to submit your questions ahead of time.
Remember, to plow through blocks, limiting beliefs, and masterfully manifest your heart’s desire, you need ongoing support. Join my free call next week to get the hands-on help you deserve.
Here’s that link again to register:
http://lisasteadman.com/ask-lisa-steadman
I look forward to speaking with you soon.
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Bad Breakups Revisited: The Broken Hearted Club Weighs In
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 14, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Think your breakup was bad? Curl up with your fellow breakup survivors to find out how other people got the boot…
“My ex broke up with me while I was out serving jury duty. He wrote me a one page letter and left it on my kitchen table so that I could see it when I got home from court. While I was in court serving jury duty, he was packing his things in his suitcase getting ready to go to the airport to fly from NYC to CA (where he is originally from). Later that afternoon I came home to find this one paged letter and an empty apartment. He is such a coward. He never even called me up to at least say sorry. We were in a relationship for over three years! I at least deserve an explanation. What I got was another really long letter via email a day later.”
- Brooke
“I had been in a four year relationship with a guy whom I fell in love with in almost an instant. While I was pregnant with his baby, I found out that he was hiding a serious drug problem from me. I helped him through detox and stuck by him through all of it. About seven months ago he cheated on me and again I forgave him. But in the end I had to break up because he got into harder drugs and I couldn’t have my baby being around all that. I am trying to get over this and be strong but the truth is, no matter how you break up or what it is over it still hurts!”
- Cherry
“Mr. Ex and I dated for almost a year and everything was great! We did everything together and had so much fun. He would shower me with beautiful gifts and I fell deeply in love with him. Then just last month we went to Vegas for vacation. We had the best time! But when we got back, he told me he wanted to explore his options and date other people. I cried for three weeks straight.”
- Carla
“When he can’t tell you everything, when he keeps his phone calls, emails and chats “too private,” when you have that gut feeling in your stomach that something’s not right – more often than not you are right! Trust issues are the worst obstacles. I should know! If you don’t trust your partner, you’ll find yourself too tired of playing Private Investigator all the time. End it while you still have your dignity intact. It’s hard but it’s the only way.”
- Lydia
“I was engaged to be married. We were together 5 years. Everything for the wedding was done and we had bought a house. He has a daughter from a previous relationship who I helped raise from the time she was 7. In June 2004, 2 weeks before my shower, he decided that he didn’t think it was going to work. He just called the whole thing off. Five months after what would have been our wedding day, he married another woman and had a baby six months later. As much as I hurt, I now realize how lucky I am. Marrying that liar would have been my biggest mistake.”
- Rosie
“I was dating this guy for five months and everything was absolutely amazing. We went places and spent almost every waking hour with each other. Then one day he just started acting kind of shady, like he didn’t want to be bothered with me anymore. Come to find out that he has this psycho baby mama that he lives with and when she found out about me, as she demanded he stopped seeing me. What was I supposed to do? They have a kid together. I had to let him go.”
- Delinda
“My ex and I were together for the best year-and-a-half of my life. We broke up because her negative family issues overwhelmed our relationship and hindered us from moving on with our lives together. I would never want to tear her away from them, but I wished she could have stopped being so dangerously co-dependent.”
- Mike
Now that you know you’re not alone, get hands-on help by picking up your very own copies of my books It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good! and It’s a Breakup, Not a Breakdown Workbook: A 21-Day Action Plan to Plot Your Revenge, Spoil Yourself, and Find Out How Good Your Life Is Without Him.
Want to share your story with me or ask me a question? Email ask@lisasteadman.com.
Don’t make THESE mistakes! (I did)
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 13, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Lisa Steadman's It's A Breakup Not A Breakdown Workbook
I get a ton of email from amazing women who are in the throes of their Big Breakup. And they all want to know one thing…
What mistakes did I make during my Big Breakup that they can avoid as they try to pick up the pieces and move on?
My initial thought is, How much time have you got?
Truthfully, I committed many cardinal breakup sins along my journey towards Happily Ever After. Specifically…
• I stayed connected to my ex, falling in and out of bed with him for ONE YEAR after our second breakup, hoping, praying, and wishing our obvious incompatibilities could be conquered by simply LOVING EACH OTHER (which we weren’t very good at to begin with!)
• While I dated other guys during that year, my heart was so connected to my ex that I pushed them all away (and lost out on some really great guys!)
• I believed I WAS THE PROBLEM, I was a failure at love, and with nothing to look forward to in my future, why not stay stuck in the past?
• I stopped believing in myself, in my value, in my beauty, in my worth (this was the worst thing that happened!)
Sound familiar? Are you making these mistakes in your own heartbreak recovery?
If so, how long are you going to punish yourself?
How long will you tell yourself that where you are is acceptable, that you deserve the pain you’re in, and that happily ever after only exists for other people?
How long are you willing to stay stuck in the pain of the past, with no hope of ever stepping into your magnificent future?
What if you stopped beating yourself up today?
What would happen if you let go of your ex, stopped taking his calls, emails, and texts, and actually went cold turkey?
What MIGHT happen if you believed that there was someone else out there for you, someone BETTER SUITED for you, and that he was doing all his emotional work to get to you in record time? Wouldn’t you do the work necessary to reach him in record time?
Wouldn’t you start loving yourself more, treating yourself with kindness and compassion, and ask for the help you DESERVE?
I know you would. I know because I’ve been there, done the work, had the faith, and moved on to MY blissful future.
I’ve also seen it time and time again with the women I work with in my 8 Week Heal Your Heart Teleclasses.
Today, I invite you to stop making those mistakes that are killing your spirit. I want you to stop robbing yourself of your happiness. By doing this one thing differently, i.e. disconnecting from your ex, you will accelerate your healing and move on in record time.
For help getting through your Big Breakup, get your copies of It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good! and It’s a Breakup, Not a Breakdown Workbook: A 21-Day Action Plan to Plot Your Revenge, Spoil Yourself, and Find Out How Good Your Life Is Without Him.
Share your successes and challenges with me here.
Suddenly Single: How to Reinvent Yourself After Heartbreak
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on June 12, 2011 - 7:00 AM
Whether you just got out of a relationship, or have been struggling to heal your broken heart for some time now, figuring out how to move on can be confusing, fear-inducing, and downright uncomfortable. Not only do you have to let go of your past, but you’ve got to be willing to embrace the unknown future.
If the task sounds daunting, don’t worry. By unlocking the following seven secrets from my 21 day workbook It’s a Breakup, Not a Breakdown Workbook: A 21-Day Action Plan to Plot Your Revenge, Spoil Yourself, and Find Out How Good Your Life Is Without Him, you’ll unleash your personal reinvention and go from “I’ll never be the same” to “What was his name?” in no time!
Secret #1: Become a “glass is half full” kind of person
Maybe your last relationship wasn’t so good. Maybe your entire relationship history makes you feel frustrated, confused, and/or disappointed. Instead of embracing bitterness or defeat, why not take a step back and look at your life from a different perspective? Start by asking yourself what you learned from your last relationship and all those previous relationships. By embracing the idea that there’s a reason for everything and/or a life lesson to be learned, how can you shift from being a “glass is half empty” kind of person to seeing the glass as half full? It may be as simple as shifting focus to the blessings in your life, rather than obsessing about what’s missing. Starting today, practice gratitude for your home, your health, your job, your friends, your pets, and/or your family. By celebrating the many blessings already in your life, you’re better able to feel good about your future, and ultimately attract healthy, happy, whole individuals who are also “glass is half full” kind of people.
Secret #2: Play up your strengths
It’s all too easy to focus on our flaws. But what if instead you played up your strengths? For example, instead of obsessing about the fact that your butt’s bigger than you’d like, or your childhood was kind of screwed up, or that you got passed over for that promotion at work, celebrate the many ways you’re magnificent. For example, rather than feel bad about your bodacious booty, show off your sexy calves by wearing sassy heels and skirts. Or, let go of your dysfunctional childhood and instead celebrate the amazing friends you have in your life right now. Or, infuse your work with renewed passion and enthusiasm, getting your boss’ attention in the process and possibly earning yourself a promotion in the months to come.
Secret #3: Fall in love with yourself
We all have those days when we don’t feel pretty, think we’ve missed out on our chance at love, and/or in general feel frustrated about the state of our lives. When you start to feel this way, remind yourself of your own innate fabulousness. You ARE a catch! You have a fantastic life full of possibility! You’re an amazing human being, flaws and all. By celebrating who you are at your very core, and learning to accept yourself warts and all, you’re better able to love and accept yourself in the moment. In the process, others will take notice. Before you know it, you’ll be attracting like-minded individuals who love themselves, warts and all.
Secret #4: Don’t take life too seriously
Sometimes it’s hard to get outside your comfort zone, take risks, and go for what you really want. But guess what? Now’s the perfect time to take life less seriously and increase your level of every day enjoyment. The radical results? You’ll free yourself from self-inflicted judgment, and create a space where doing things that once scared you now feels not only possible but easy. Maybe you’ll start writing that book, take that trip abroad, approach a cute stranger and just say hi, or splurge on your first home (a feat that once felt impossible). Whatever it is that used to seem out of reach, give yourself permission to go for it, starting today. By not taking yourself or your life too seriously, you begin to enjoy your everyday experiences so much more and start attracting amazing individuals.
Secret #5: Make time for things you enjoy
It’s all too easy to get bogged down by obligation. But what if in 2009, you regularly took time away from your “have to” schedule for that equally important “want to” list? At least once a week, make a date with yourself and have some fun. From signing up for salsa dance class to attending a creative workshop that speaks to you to having game night with friends, play time is just as important (if not more) as work time. By creating space to feed your spirit, you awaken your best self. The results? A more satisfying life, plus the possibility of meeting like-minded potential partners.
Secret #6: Meet new people
Now that you’re single again, it’s time to get out of your comfort zone and find like-minded individuals. Volunteer for a cause near and dear to you. Join a new club or take up a new activity. Get involved in your community. In the process, you’ll meet inspired individuals with similar interests. Seek them out on a regular basis and enjoy time with new friends. You never know how these new connections will enhance your life. From finding love to embarking on new adventures to experiencing amazing new opportunities, now’s your chance to expand your social circle.
Secret #7: Invest in your personal development
With your heart on the mend, why not do something to inspire personal growth? It’s a great way to celebrate yourself and encourage continued expansion. Invest in a self help book that appeals to you. Spend time with a mentor or guru you admire. Hire a life coach and create and action plan for the next six months. By investing in yourself and your personal development, you’ll be well-equipped to celebrate the amazing individual that you are and continue to become. Love that!
Learning to celebrate yourself is the key to rocking your breakup recovery. By unlocking the seven secrets above in the coming months, you’re sure to go from Boohoo! to Woohoo! in no time.
Share your challenges and successes here or on my Facebook Fan page.
And be sure to get your very own copies of my books It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good! and It’s a Breakup, Not a Breakdown Workbook: A 21-Day Action Plan to Plot Your Revenge, Spoil Yourself, and Find Out How Good Your Life Is Without Him.
