Archive for December, 2009
30 Day Woohoo Challenge: Day #6 — Create Your Relationship Requirements, Wants, and Needs
Now's the time to get specific. You can't call in love until you know what you want, need, and REQUIRE from a partner.
Today, start making your list of relationship qualities and traits your perfect partner possesses. Then divide the list into requirements, wants, and needs. Share your results here or on my Facebook Fan Page.
30 Day Woohoo Challenge: Day #2 – Who are you still holding onto?
Today, I want you to start identifying who/what is holding you back on your journey to find love.
First, ask yourself this:
Are you still hung up on your ex?
Whether he's still in your life or not, your ex may be sabotaging your chances of finding love if:
- you compare every man you meet to your ex and they never measure up
- your ex’s criticical messages are in your head constantly, i.e. "You’re too fat", "You're too screwed up", "You’ll come back – watch!"
- you’re so afraid of getting hurt again that you’re completely shut down when it comes to love
OR, do you live with the story that tells you you're unworthy of love?
Have you spent a lifetime in silent agreement about what's possible for you in life and love?
Maybe you cosmically agreed you’d be healthy and successful but alone and lonely, or that you can have love but be poor.
Or who are you afraid of punishing if you're happy?
"I won’t be more successful or happy than my parents,” is a common silent agreement. So are:
- "My mom told me I didn’t deserve love, so it must be true."
30 Day Woohoo Challenge: Day #2 – Who are you still holding onto?
Today, I want you to start identifying who/what is holding you back on your journey to find love.
First, ask yourself this:
Are you still hung up on your ex?
Whether he's still in your life or not, your ex may be sabotaging your chances of finding love if:
- you compare every man you meet to your ex and they never measure up
- your ex’s criticical messages are in your head constantly, i.e. "You’re too fat", "You're too screwed up", "You’ll come back – watch!"
- you’re so afraid of getting hurt again that you’re completely shut down when it comes to love
OR, do you live with the story that tells you you're unworthy of love?
Have you spent a lifetime in silent agreement about what's possible for you in life and love?
Maybe you cosmically agreed you’d be healthy and successful but alone and lonely, or that you can have love but be poor.
Or who are you afraid of punishing if you're happy?
"I won’t be more successful or happy than my parents,” is a common silent agreement. So are:
- "My mom told me I didn’t deserve love, so it must be true."
Have you been “Turkey Dropped”?
I just read this on npr.org. Click here to listen to the audio story on All Things Considered. And yes, I subscribe to kcrw, so I'm sure they don't mind me re-purposing their material...
It's not just turkeys that get nervous this time of year. Chances are high that a failing relationship will also meet its end during the holidays. That's because it's not just turkey season — it's turkey drop season.
"The turkey drop is that holiday breakup season where all the college students return home for their first major vacation, and everyone breaks up," Washington University junior Carly MacLeod tells guest host Robert Smith. She writes the romance column for the student newspaper.
It's often freshmen who do the majority of the turkey dropping, MacLeod says. After three months living apart and making new friends, high school sweethearts reunite to find their long-distance relationship is more burden than they want. Upcoming finals add to the emotional stress. "Go home, hook up and break up is pretty much the pattern," MacLeod says.
You're not safe from the turkey drop if you're out of college, either, according to relationship and sex advice guru Dan Savage. "For grown-ups," he says, "it's the anticipation of being stuck for three or four more months.
